Debunking myths :: Homeschoolers are antisocial
The #1 concern I hear from others is socialization
The truth is I wasn’t concerned about socialization until people started to ask about it, when they found out we homeschooled. I just want to state it here that we actually don’t live in a bubble and we leave the house almost daily! I know crazy! Really though I’d like to label what we do as naturally socializing. Then it got me thinking that maybe this isn’t so natural anymore! Are kids only expected to learn all their social skills by being in a same age group of kids for 5 days a week, hours upon hours? Well I’m here to tell you that there is more to socialization then that!
Also I really want to state that not everyone is extroverted! It has taken me years of work to be able to throw myself into a scene and make my way around conversation. Maybe it was because I was overwhelmed with kids in my school! HA! Whatever ever the case may be, I feel like naturally socializing is such an easy concept - so lets dive in!
One of our many days at the beach with friends
How we get social
In the early years we lived in the center of town and we had sidewalks, which I miss dearly. During those first six years we did a lot of our socializing right there in front of our home. We would see our neighbors everyday on their own morning walks, we would go to the grocery store, the library, little shops that were near by and we even met other kids! These places saw us so much that we were practically on a first name basis with everyone.
I don’t think I was ever once worried that my kids didn’t see other people because it all happened naturally! What might be happening is people are so used to school children or those who hear stories about those homeschoolers who never left the house - that now everyone worries!
Worry no more folks! We socialize so much that we have to have home days to unwind. Which we actually love and look forward to.
ahhhh homedays
All ages + all kinds of people
An advantage to homeschooling is being able to hang with a wide range of ages all the time. We spend a good amount time with younger kids and even babies - they love to learn how to be with them and even practice being a role model. When older kids (adults too) are around they like to observe, ask questions and learn to have an actual conversation with a peer by talking and listening.
Of course on the other side of this - I want my kids to meet other kids who don’t homeschool. Learning to relate or just play with others who don’t live life the same as us - is important to me! At our old house we had older kids next door who went to school. They played for hours outside at each others houses. The older kids showed them how to play their favorite board games and my kids showed them how we take care of our chickens. An excellent learning experience of give and take.
So if you are thinking you just need to find other homeschoolers out there to socialize with…. think again! Sometimes our most social days are random conversations with people at the grocery store, or when we stop at the post office and we see the same postmaster is there to greet us and chat about life.
Our trip to the ballet! Sure they skipped, hopped & jumped on the sidewalk while others walked more formally but as soon as the show started - they sat and watched for two whole hours!
However it does take work to develop this attitude towards socialization. For us it was about letting it happen naturally by getting out and visiting new places, seeing friends & helping them along the way. By helping them I mean give them pointers on which places they can be wild at and other places where they need to be a bit less wild. A healthy balance! The art of socializing. Also know that it won’t be perfect all the time - they are kids after all and human. Let them be kids and figure it out on their own too.
The idea that homeschoolers just stay in their homes with their family is way outdated.
I don’t think anyone asking about socialization is out of line - it’s more about spreading the knowledge on how socialization works and that it’s not just people in school who are getting it.
